he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
