we need to drink 2009 down the drain
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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