eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize