either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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