He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
