Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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