My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
