how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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