Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize