Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
