It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
