i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
The power of my boobs compel you
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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