they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
