Where did you get a picture of my penis
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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