I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
