well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
