so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize