wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize