I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
