i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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