call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize