I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize