Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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