So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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