im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
