wakey wakey hands off snakey
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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