it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
