Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize