We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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