Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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