and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
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