So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
