i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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