i can't believe i had my finger in that
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
