You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Randomize