Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
