garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize