I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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