I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
