You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
