He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize