Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
