you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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