Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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