I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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