Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
