Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
