I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
