How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
