It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
